Summers over

ok so school is about to start. We have had a very busy summer with regular season softball, and extended season of lacrosse, and softball is starting up again for the fall. Hannah and Danielle are playing fast pitch.
I feel like I accomplished a lot this summer. Tawney and I got fish up and running, we're just about done with that. Danielle and I painted the living room and touched up the trim in the kitchen. I wanted to paint the kitchen and the bathroom, but I ran out of time. I started to clean the carpet in the living room only to find out it wasn't worth cleaning so we made an insurance claim and we're getting new carpet. I planted a garden this summer. It went in too late for the tomatoes to grow but I have gotten a lot of zucchini and cucumbers so far. It looks like the peppers will do well also. The funny thing is I planted broccoli and cabbage too. LOL they are doing great! I actually harvested two broccoli.
The sunporch is almost done. My brother was living out there for about a month. But he's gone now so it looks like we can finish it on time. I mean by October before it gets really cold and the kids can have a place to go out of my hair.
We start cyber school next week. That should be interesting. I have4 kids in cyber and they each have 4 different homeroom teachers. I hope they dont plan on me sitting through 4 different orientation meetings.AARRGGG!!! I dont want to go to one of them...but we do what we must! It looks like school will be really fun this year for them. I am hoping to go school shopping this weekend for them to buy some school supplies and a few new clothes. To make it as close to "real" school as I can.

But God

The title to this blog is let my lifesong be a pleasing fragrance to you...that's not in reference to you exactly but rather to God.

Lets think about that for a minute. What exactly does that mean?

Let my lifesong be a pleasing fragrance to you.

Well I can tell you what its not...

Its not judging or criticism or harsh words or thoughts. It's not getting caught up in the past mistakes or sins of your life.



Why is it so hard to get away from my past? why does it seem to keep following me. Well this time I guess I sort of invited it. OK I'm speaking of my brother. Hes here, I mean here living with us. Its been four weeks now. and finally it looks like hes moving out next week. At first I felt bad for him, but not so much now. I'm not angry just tired of facing my past EVERYDAY! I hate what i had to live through to get to the good part of my life. I don't want to revisit it everyday at random times throughout the day. I worked very hard to get over or suppress those feelings and memories so it wouldn't ruin me or my present life. I hate being reminded of things my mom did to me or us. I hate thinking about how much I hated my life, how depressed I was. Life wasn't worth living for a while. In fact if I hadn't been Catholic I would have committed suicide in my mid-teen years. BUT GOD...But God knew what He had in store for me after all the wrath was over; so He super-naturally empowered me to go on. I said it was because I was Catholic, but the truth is God had a strong hold on my life long before I knew him.

At random times Satan temps me to dispare about those things in my past, and today was one of those days. BUT GOD...was there to help me through it once again. I am so glad I have the Lord to help me through, because those daggers of doubt can be hard to fight through myself.

Lord let my lifesong be a pleasing fragrance to you, not because of what I've done, but because of what you've done for me.